June 27, 2008

And he don't wanna hear none of your jibba jabba about it neither, fool! He pities the fool.

June 24, 2008

Your Weekly Catherine

Week Twenty-Four

This is an ode to Warrick and Catherine, the couple that never was. In honor of Warrick's untimely departure and Catherine's loss, a few of their greatest hits...

Season 2 Episode A Little Murder. In which Warrick comforts Catherine after she reveals that the attack she suffered at an unsecured crime scene has left her with lingering fear.

Season 3 Episode Snuff. In which Warrick and Cat exchange smouldering glances while investigating the origins of an apparent snuff film. Who knew car bumpers could be such an aphrodisiac?

Season 4 Episode Homebodies. In which Warrick changes shirts, rendering the plot narrative pointless and instantly forgettable for both Catherine and viewers at home.

Season 4 Episode Invisible Evidence. In which the team has to re-open an old case when a key piece of evidence is thrown out in court. Again with Warrick, Cat, and those sexy car parts.

Season 5 Episode Down the Drain. In which Warrick and Cat investigate a drowned body in a storm drain. Which is apparently a Vegas euphemism for physical attraction. This is one of my favorite moments with these two.

Season 7 Episode Leapin' Lizards. In which our intrepid pair demonstrate swordplay for Grissom. And that is not a euphemism for anything. In an episode involving cult members slicing up invading lizard people from space disguised as world leaders and police, this was one of the lesser of the bizarre moments.

Season 8 Episode A La Carte. In which Warrick uses night vision goggles to sneak up on Catherine in a pitch black restaurant crime scene. She doesn't mind.

Season 8 Episode For Gedda. In which Warrick makes one of what will be his final appearances. 'Kiss me, Cat' and other bad puns come to mind but this is simply a sweetly intimate moment between two friends who have been through a lot together.

Farewell, Warrick. We'll miss you. But, I suspect, not as much as Catherine.

June 23, 2008

The Star Wars opening narrative crawl.

Iconic, no? So iconic and instantly recognizable that it was bound, decades and prequels and re-releases and generations of fandom later, to inspire its own website. Starwarscrawl.com was basically an interactive site where you could put your own text into the generator provided and have it appear in the form of the Star Wars crawl. It was a coding site made by Star Wars fans for Star Wars fans, in a nutshell. It became so popular that a couple of days ago it was featured on the IMDb hit list. I was going to make a crawl of my own out of the CSI theme song and post it here just to mash pop culture items together in an unholy union for the sake of amusement. But a funny thing happened in between finding it a handful of days ago on IMDb and actually sitting down to write the post. Namely, this:

"This site has been closed.

LucasFilm has asked us to remove this site. We have enjoyed seeing the tens of thousands of users over the past several days, and thank you for your interest."

If you head to www.starwarscrawl.com now, the above message is all you'll get.

Really, George Lucas? REALLY? The man who single-handedly destroyed his own genius credibility by making the hotly-debated prequel trilogy (Bad? Good? So bad they're good? So terrible they can be forgotten? Nobody will ever be able to decide on the truth) is protective of his legacy to the point of pouncing on coders who play with the opening crawl sequence for fan joke purposes? The man who re-mastered the original trilogy and added wholly unnecessary scenes including the one featuring Jabba the Hut walking around the Milennium Falcon hangar at eye level with Han and a shot that proves Greedo fired first is so protective of his damn yellow lettering that he requests fans take down the disrespectful site that infringes on the copyright? Please.

I'll probably get a cease and desist letter from LucasFilm now for posting not only the photo of the crawl I ripped from the world wide ethernet but my opinions besides. All I can say to that is [eye roll]. For godsakes. If you won't allow fans to express themselves then pretty soon there won't be any fans and no number of financially successful but critically savaged Indy re-boots will coax estranged fans back into your corner. Lucas, you're damn lucky you still have any fans left at all after the re-mastering and Jar-Jar debacles so if I may offer a word to the wise? Get a sense of humor. A Star Wars crawl site is the least of your worries, let me tell you.

And if you're interested in suing, I have nothing to give you and I gain nothing by bashing you so save the legal fees and chalk it up to free speech.