December 21, 2006

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
just like the ones I used to know
where the treetops glisten
and children listen
to hear sleighbells in the snow
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
with every Christmas card I write
may your days be merry and bright
and may all your Christmases be white

From the land on the bottom of the world, in the humid glare of summer sun, I am dreaming of a white Christmas. I've found a way to hear those sleighbells at last and it has nothing to do with snow. It's about who you're with. So I wish every one of you a joyous holiday. May your days indeed be merry and bright and may all your Christmases be white... at least in spirit.

Let the people who make your Christmas white know you love them.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!


December 19, 2006


I have one more day of work left and then I am free for three weeks. Ye Olde Workplace shuts down for three weeks over Christmas and I am effectively out of a job... until the new year. Unemployment has never sounded so sweet!

No more "I'll have a half-strength decaf soy latte please".
No more "I object to your sign that says you have DVDs on sale that would make perfect Christmas gifts. I do NOT celebrate Christmas. It offends me on humanitarian grounds".
No more "It says you have postcardS on your sign outside. I see only ONE type of postcard. Not postcardS plural. I only see SINGULAR. Not PLURAL".

The customer is always right? Fuck that noise. Those always right customers have obviously never met me. I once told a lady who was asking for her year-long complimentary theatre tickets to be renewed due to "nothing that interested me in the past year to use them on" that her personal lack of taste in movies had nothing to do with me so no, I wouldn't extend them.

Of course I also once told a theatre customer who wanted to know what Steven Seagal's movie Fire Down Below was about that it was, in fact, about gonorrhea. So... I may not be the best customer service mentor you could have. Though in my defense, aren't all Steven Seagal movies about the same thing?

Anyway, only one more day. And then I have three weeks to make merry and dance around like a loon wearing those paper hats you get in Christmas crackers. One of which, actually, I'm wearing right now! *begins dancing*