October 31, 2006

I had forgotten all about my credo.

Neco et conseco erga quos noceo bestia.

Back on my 28th birthday, or The Birthday of One Thousand Gifts as I affectionately call it, Homie of the Beareth Clan showered me, his then-roommate, with a week-long serenade of gifts. Each one was specially chosen to remind me of some hilarious or poignant thing that we had encountered or done together. It was amazing. One of the gifts was a play called "Once Upon a Time Lola and Poe" that Homie had written just for me and in it he unveiled my own personal Latin motto.

Neco et conseco erga quos noceo bestia.


Death and dismemberment to those who harm animals.

It's a sly reference to one of my favorite lines in The Addams Family. Anjelica Huston as Morticia says to Fester during their tour of the family graveyard, "The Addams Family credo. 'Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc.' We gladly feast on those who would subdue us. Not just pretty words."

It's also obviously a reference to my enduring love for animals and in the course of Homie's play is spoken by me, backed up by tigers that have been rescued from an underground lair in the West Edmonton Mall, in an ultimatum to Phil Bronstein that he abandon his evil plot to imprison or illegally sell wild animals to exact revenge on the Komodo dragon that bit him. During this exchange, Poe (my cat) and Lola (my former car) are on a mission to retrieve my treasured copy of Bound from thieving duendes in a cemetery... Okay, actually the play is full of so many in-jokes and private references that nobody in their right mind would even understand it, much less find it amusing. Except for me. And Homie. And hot damn, I find it HILARIOUSLY amusing! I rediscovered it yesterday and am still laughing. This is just one more reason why Homie needs a more public platform from which to spread his joyous words and imagination. Publishers? Are you listening?

It is also another reason why Michelle is one of the luckiest women on the planet. Homie is truly one of the most generous, gifted, loving, and insightful persons in the world.

I should mention that I have no proof that Phil Bronstein has ever actually dabbled in illegal wildlife trades. I think it's called "creative license". I believe at the time of the writing I was angry at him for allegedly suing his ex-wife Sharon Stone for spousal support or something. I get on rants about strange things and Homie remembers them all in humorous stageplay format.

I digress.

The point is that I have reclaimed my motto.

The VampireNomad credo. "Neco et conseco erga quos noceo bestia." Death and dismemberment to those who harm animals. Not just pretty words.