March 2, 2006

When surfing the internet, wear a helmet.

I love it when my sphere of influence spreads. Though it is a bit alarming how many random links "vampirenomad" brings up in a google search, it's also mightily amusing. Of course The Crypt is number one. And number two. And the majority of the rest of the links too. But how in holy hell does "vampirenomad" bring up links to sporting goods sites and gay porn?

I'm not even gonna touch that one. But I'm sort of bizarrely honored just the same.

This means there must be more lurkers than I think. *peers narrowly through the shadows* Luuuuuurkers! Here Lurky-Lurkys!

If you type "opinionated asshole" into google, you find Torch at Thoughts From the Sugar Bowl. Every other opinionated asshole or hater of opinionated assholes in the webosphere will find Torch that way. You can't BUY that kind of publicity! So in an effort to broaden my sphere of influence, I am now going to type in random phrases that will force people outside my immortal reach to seek me out against their better judgement to hang on every word I say. In a few days, I'll have extended my clammy hands farther even than Torch the Opinionated Asshole. (Actually, given the number of times I've said "opinionated asshole" in this post, I'll probably take over the number one spot from him. HA!! VICTORY IS MINE!!)

*clears throat* I begin.

Olympic glory for Antarctica!
Meat is murder.
Why do cowgirls get the blues?
I like toast.
Orlando Bloom to guest star on Sesame Street.
Canadian summers leave Fiji in envy.
What is purple?
TORCH, YOU'RE AN OPINIONATED ASSHOLE!

Hehe.

Now, anybody who surfs on in (with or without the recommended safety helmet) in the next few days had better offer me a courtesy bite. Come on, Lurkers! Don't be shy. I won't bite. *laughs at her own joke*
I got my immigration permit. *grin* I get to stay in Middle-earth!

I just bought a gorgeous new copy of The Arabian Nights to celebrate.

I love it here.