June 9, 2004

For all one of you who begged for another entry...

Very Secret Diaries of Troy

Prince Hector of Troy

Day Three
It's not that Paris is dumb so much as a relentless pain in my well-toned ass.

Day Six
Paris obviously has no concept whatsoever of marriage or, say, death by sword. Though between the two of them will die of pretty before we ever get attacked. Don't really get the whole Helen thing personally. Blondes aren't so much my thing.

Day Ten
Have just met Achilles. Blondes are so my thing.

Day Eleven
Andromache caught me at 'he loves me/he loves me not' with her feather boa and threw a hissy. Said I wasn't much of a role model for Astyanax. Oh and Paris would be. All that preening and wife-stealing and I still get blamed for everything.

Day Twelve
Would now be a rich man if had bet on challenge. Funny how Paris is considered the stud of the family. Helen could take Menelaus - and probably did for all the gold in Sparta.

Am sure Father's thrilled. Am sure I don't care as suddenly there's a man with a tree for a neck trying to bludgeon my skull in. Damn Paris and his total inability to think with any body part not hidden by his skirts.

Day Thirteen
Told Father and rest of the Old White Guy Fraternity that attacking the Greeks would be a bad idea. Naturally Father got his King on and pulled the old "Who holds the sword of Troy?" routine. Was tempted to say "Helen" but thought better of it as Paris would certainly get huffy. Apparently we attack at dawn.

Hope Achilles shows.

Day Fourteen
Achilles did show and only wanted to fight. Conversation and a cuddle is lost art these days. Humored him and ended up killing him. Oops.

Turns out I killed Patroclus instead. In my defense, he was running about in Achilles drag. As he most certainly was Achilles' lover cousin, the day is not a total loss.

Day Fifteen
Am being called out by Achilles. Feeling quivery at the thought. Andromache says not to go for Astyanax's sake. Why? As though any Trojan child born in the last decade isn't Paris'. Father is of course hosting a big to-do up on the walls of the city. Would have preferred a bit of privacy but no dice.

Does Achilles condition his hair?

Damn, probably should have been watching his sword instead of rippled arm holding the sword. As now said sword is sticking out of my chest.

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