September 22, 2003

I am living in forward time. The time setting on this blog is an hour ahead. Every time I post I lose a piece of my life for the chance to write from the future. This prompts me to tell the story of how I came home today to find a voice mail message from Officer Jordan Kline of Starfleet Academy telling me my application to the Academy had been accepted and my posting to the USS Geek was imminent. Okay, yes. I watched Star Trek: the Next Generation and I loved it. My boss, god bless his meddling heart, finds tormenting me amusing. 'Officer Jordan Kline' called from a place that sounds suspiciously like the shipping-receiving warehouse at work. Which, incidentally, is not aboard the USS Geek. I'm not living in the future, I just have reality issues in the present.

Somehow I'm now reminded of the time when my friend Dave and I were unceremoniously removed from Toys'R'Us for what Dave called 'de-pinking' the Barbie aisle. We were bootlegging G.I. Joes from the action figure aisle and hanging them in the Barbie aisle when security descended en masse. It's considered bad form to run through toy stores with arm loads of action figures, apparently, even if you're not planning thievery. Mischief is bad enough in the black-and-white world of toys. Geoffrey runs a tight ship.

Remember that game where you draw hair on a blank face through the miracle of a magnetic pen and iron shavings? We were so easily amused in our day. Not that I'm old... despite the fact that Gotthammer berated me for laughing at Blainonia's age last night at the G... still I am young. It's the world that's grown up around me. Amusements are not as simple now as they once were. Faster. Harder. Longer. Better. I don't just mean in bed, either. Everything must entertain our wandering eyes at top speed with the most impressive displays of light and sound or we will tire of it. I wonder about the speed at which life must be lived in order to maintain, to keep pace, to even stay afloat. There are moments when I'm not willing to tread water in the rapids of society any more and I want something more measured. Those moments come to me as flashes of inspiration for travel. I see myself roaming in farflung lands criss-crossed by dirt roads and stands of trees through which wild creatures skulk at will. It's a beautiful vision of the future. A place to breathe. A place to stand still. A place that is simple in it's complexity where I can be amused by the absolutes of the world.

And in the meantime the boss is SO getting a call from the Daily Planet asking if he wants to renew his subscription to the weekend special section on 'Living With Nerdism'.

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